12:53 AM Posted In Thanksbreathing Edit This 2 Comments »
Thanks giving to God, and to my fellow human
A rambling tale of my heart at the moment:
I suppose in every choice I am thankful for the freedom to choose it
I am thankful that while God could be anything, that he is Good
There have been deserts and tropical islands and cement shoes at the bottom of the ocean
Thanks for every place you've taken me
I think of every simple thing that I am thankful for
And they all become manifestations of God
When I hold them to light
And I am thankful for some clarity of vision
In that sense
Today I became accutely aware and anxious
That my choosing to follow the essential passion
The ticking in my soul, the God in me
It leaves me out of control, not like wild
Rather out of control of myself in a fearfully constricting way
And then I remembered that it is okay,
Because it isn't like I'm giving it up to someone else like me
I am giving it up to the one who knows both the plan and the person
That I can actually do best what I am best suited to do
If I continue to commit to this
So the universe is returned to order
Lucky for all of you
My anxieties subsiding in appropriate ways
As I recognize my lack of control as a gainful-loss
So I am thankful, at the moment, for the God whose nature makes me as I am and makes that alright at the same time.
The other things are great. The gravy. The house the cars the food the job the family supporting me the friends the senses. And I am thankful for them in many ways. But to me a prayer of thanks is like an exhaling. A joyful acceptance of things as they are, in and out. If I had none of the gravy I would be as thankful. I am sure of it. I'm not proud, I just want to be honest. That's all.
A rambling tale of my heart at the moment:
I suppose in every choice I am thankful for the freedom to choose it
I am thankful that while God could be anything, that he is Good
There have been deserts and tropical islands and cement shoes at the bottom of the ocean
Thanks for every place you've taken me
I think of every simple thing that I am thankful for
And they all become manifestations of God
When I hold them to light
And I am thankful for some clarity of vision
In that sense
Today I became accutely aware and anxious
That my choosing to follow the essential passion
The ticking in my soul, the God in me
It leaves me out of control, not like wild
Rather out of control of myself in a fearfully constricting way
And then I remembered that it is okay,
Because it isn't like I'm giving it up to someone else like me
I am giving it up to the one who knows both the plan and the person
That I can actually do best what I am best suited to do
If I continue to commit to this
So the universe is returned to order
Lucky for all of you
My anxieties subsiding in appropriate ways
As I recognize my lack of control as a gainful-loss
So I am thankful, at the moment, for the God whose nature makes me as I am and makes that alright at the same time.
The other things are great. The gravy. The house the cars the food the job the family supporting me the friends the senses. And I am thankful for them in many ways. But to me a prayer of thanks is like an exhaling. A joyful acceptance of things as they are, in and out. If I had none of the gravy I would be as thankful. I am sure of it. I'm not proud, I just want to be honest. That's all.
2 comments:
Courtney it could be because i'm pretty tired...but when I read this it was so beautiful that I could almost hear music playing while I read it. Thanks for writing this.
Courtney, I am thankful for you.
-Mike
I'm thankful for C-Pat too!
Hmm... music playing? Maybe I should get on that....
Great post, C-Pat, but I have to confess that when our family was putting the Thanksgiving dinner on our plates (we did it buffet-style), I didn't see the gravy at first, and I got quite scared. If I had none of the gravy, I wouldn't be quite as thankful.
;)
AJ
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